Text: “Do not speak in the hearing of a fool, for he will despise the good sense of your words” (Pr 23:9).

This line is from the wisdom literature in Scripture; it’s Proverbs 23:9 from the pen of Solomon. He’s instructing his son in wisdom. And the thrust of wisdom is that it is rooted in the fear of the Lord, and that reverential fear drives the wise person in the right and wise way to live in this world.

The matter addressed in this verse is the issue of when to speak and when to remain silent. Part of making the wise decision comes in knowing one’s audience.

Who is the person that Solomon calls “a fool” (v. 9a)? Does the person actually want the truth? It brings to mind the famous episode of Jack Nicholson in the film A Few Good Men, when Nicholson hollered from the stand in the courtroom, “You can’t handle the truth!”

This verse from Proverbs 23:9 is not so much about being unable to endure the truth; it is rather about the difference between teachability and unteachability. The “fool” is unteachable, not in the sense that he cannot understand but rather that he refuses to understand. He does not want the truth, because it exposes him as a fool. It is a matter of his obstinacy and recalcitrance. It is not a fault in his intellect but sin holding sway over his heart, soul, and affections.

Jesus of course taught the same thing in the Gospels. “Do not give dogs what is holy, and do not throw your pearls before pigs, lest they trample them underfoot and turn to attack you” (Mt 7:6). The teaching is overt: fools do not value wisdom or truth. They insist upon doing things their way. They are, to use the Bible’s language, fools.

Knowing the difference between the foolish and the wise is integral to effective communication. The wise among us know to distinguish between the two types, when to speak and when just to remain silent.

When I was a boy, I was fortunate to be surrounded by builders. My stepfather amazed me in the ways he intuitively understood how anything was put together. He seemed to just “get it” when it came to construction, electrical work, masonry, etc. His father was the same way. He understood engines, masonry, roofing, wiring, et al. I was amazed. I have an affection for all of the above but I don’t have the aptitude. That’s simply not where my strengths lie.

This morning I was completing my reading through 2 Chronicles and then later found myself in Proverbs 1:7: “The fear of the LORD is the beginning of knowledge; fools despise wisdom and instruction.” And there was the same principle: the beginning. The foundation.

“The end depends upon the beginning,” is a common aphorism from the classics. It’s sage counsel. There are exceptions, of course. We all know of people who had rocky starts but then surprised us all by the way they turned out. I remember when I was still teaching full-time and had some students that I had serious doubts about, but somehow they pulled through, and I’m thrilled they did.

But in theological terms, Solomon’s aphorism is spot-on: “The fear of the LORD is the beginning of knowledge; fools despise wisdom and instruction” (Pr 1:7). If the foundation is unsound or faulty or cracked or weak, all that’s built upon it is compromised. This is why first things matter so much–our presuppositions.

Sometimes when I look at the culture, I sense that it is unraveling. Things seem to be upside-down. Somehow things that seemed to have been obvious are suddenly not obvious. And it results in things like moral crassness and loss of civility. Whatever happened to “Please” and “Thank you”? People might scoff at such things now. How antiquated, they might say. Well, yes! But what’s wrong with antiquated? Civility is better than what we have now.

But that’s exactly what Solomon was laboring to get us to understand. It’s the moral fool who scoffs at righteousness. The fool is a scoffer; he’s a mocker. He’s the smart aleck, if you will. He mocks the holy. But he’s living a life built upon a faulty foundation. How and where one begins is of crucial significance. I’m with Solomon.

When I reflect on the many times I had to dig footers and mix the concrete, I didn’t realize at the time that the same logic applied in the moral and theological world. But I look back now and am grateful.

Text:

4 Answer not a fool according to his folly,
    lest you be like him yourself.
⁵ Answer a fool according to his folly,
    lest he be wise in his own eyes. (Proverbs 26:4-5)

Questions:

• Have you ever asked yourself if it was wise to respond to someone?
• Have you ever responded and then later regretted doing so?
• Have you ever not responded and later wished you had?

If you’re like I am, you probably answered yes to each of the above queries.

That’s the heart of what Solomon speaks to in the above proverb. There are times when it’s wise to just let some folks go; it’s what the Bible pictures as casting pearls before swine. Some folks are just a lost cause. You can try to teach them but you’re wasting your time. They remain bent on being obtuse, and God says to shake the dust from your sandals and drive on. Otherwise, it’s a waste of your time and theirs.

Then there are other times when not speaking to an issue is deleterious. Failing to speak up, failing to address error, etc. can sometimes be a way of the coward. I know there are many times when I sit in meetings and hear a bunch of psychobabble about how to address spiritual issues, and think to myself, I’m surrounded by moral idiots. These pop psychology bromides have about as much depth as a kiddie pool. When I’m hurting, or when another soldier is hurting, or life and death are at stake, I don’t want happy-clappy cliches; I want truth and depth.

Encouragement: When does the wise person respond, and when should he remain silent? That’s the issue in these two verses from Proverbs. The wisdom comes in learning to distinguish between audiences. Some folks are just a waste of your time and theirs; they’re not teachable. So, in sum, move on. At other times, however, the loving and right thing to do is to act with grace and courage by telling the truth–and sometimes that truth may be perceived as hard. But it’s truth that saves.

Types: One can divide the world into at least two categories of people: 1) those characterized by wisdom and 2) those characterized by folly.

When I was a boy, I was very close to my grandparents. I have always gravitated to people of depth. And they were certainly that–people of depth. They may not have had lots of letters after their names but, believe me, they were wise. The aphorisms that issued from their lips were among the most shaping influences upon my life. Now that I’m a grandpa, I aim to pass that wisdom on to my own grandchildren. Our kids are grown now, so they are making their own ways in life, but my bride and I hope and trust that the Lord will grip them in His sovereignty and that they, too, will lead lives of inculcated wisdom.

Connection: In the wisdom literature of Scripture, Solomon penned these four masterpiece lines:

A faithful witness does not lie,
    but a false witness breathes out lies.
A scoffer seeks wisdom in vain,
    but knowledge is easy for a man of understanding.
Leave the presence of a fool,
    for there you do not meet words of knowledge.
The wisdom of the prudent is to discern his way,
    but the folly of fools is deceiving. (Pr 14:5-8)

Teaching: I know that some folks struggle with poetry. So here is the prosaic expression of Solomon’s wisdom:

• Faithfulness is wed inextricably to honesty
• Mockers do not want wisdom; they ‘scoff’ at it
• The wise person will flee that folly
• Discernment is a characteristic of the wise man/woman

Encouragement: If I could have any people who have died returned to my life for their wisdom and love, it would be my grandparents and my father-in-law. Why? Because they were wise, discerning people. They did not suffer fools. May we be blessed by surrounding ourselves with wise, discerning, godly influences.